when you feel like there's something missing and you can attack it

im thinking that the only way ill be able to get over missing you i s if i write with frequency. don't get use to it. but i like it. prefer it. maybe you've notice my lack of updates. i'm unmotivated and repellingly placing all my efforts towards little emails and an assortment of face book messages comments etc.. who knows? i ate a couple cookies so far. when i dip them in milk i'm nostalgic .


i remember watching this episode of cribs (the show with andrew and houses) and they focused on a screen writer some kind of creative music video producer. he was Japanese. and slept on a mattress directly on the ground next to a note pad. in the middle of dreaming he gets an idea and this method of scripture was present daily and you know those routines that are really good to get into? i'm interested in that.

i wonder how long i can stay awake before feeling the mountain of tiredness.. in fact there's something coming right now and my extreme sport legs are starting to swallow all signs of soreness relief.

why do i feel so old?

i had a rough time focusing on sleeping because there's rafa on the couch and he was sort of facing my way eyes shut but i couldn't imagine him not watching me. not in a creepy way but there's that awkwardness when people sleep in the living room and you wake up with the opposite of a stagnant voice; there's nothing fabulous about it,. naturally there's a bit of time before i realize how to feel comfortable again.
anyways speaking of which
just know
that i'm looking for ch ch ch changes.

that's right something drastic, something that makes me feel like i'm a cat being thrown in the air or i'm speeding down a hill or in a car playing roller coaster.
you can carry the conversation you can find a spot for all my clothes you can rush me... and in return i will be your personal secretary ill get you feeling pumped. you'll like it. ..

and then that's it and then we're fine.

but for now i'm very tired and wouldn't mind having a banana.